I have been experiencing some major cabin fever/winter doldrums lately. It is likely due to the 2 weeks of extremely COLD weather followed by a week straight of rain/slush/ice. We bought the cross-country ski attachment for the Chariot so we could haul Paul along while we ski, but we haven't even been able to use it due to the recent unseasonably warm March-like weather. Our fun these days mostly consists of laughing at Paul. He is a constant bundle of energy - running after Nora, dancing to Louis Prima, kicking his soccer ball, and of course, popping his popper (thanks, Anna, I think...) Hard to believe he'll already be 1 year old in just a couple of weeks.
On a related note, we are planning to start daycare a couple times of week so I can get some work done on my Ph.D. Unfortunately, our plans coincide with some major separation anxiety issues that Paul has developed the last few weeks. We can't even leave him with my dad for 30 minutes or at the daycare at the gym without a complete meltdown. Any advice from you seasoned parents out there?
Paul is seriously attached to kitchen utensils - especially flippers and large spoons
He's got next
Paul is seriously attached to kitchen utensils - especially flippers and large spoons
He's got next
8 comments:
Sarah had major separation anxiety too. The first few times I took her to the gym when she was about 18-19 months. I just had to leave her to cry and she got used to it. Then when she started preschool at age 2 she cried at drop off almost EVERY day until about April. The teacher said she only cried about 5 minutes before she would stop.
I did find that the quicker my goodbye was, the easier the separation was.....
Paul will adjust to daycare once he finds out that it can be fun to be with other kids.
Sometimes, I think this is tougher on the parents than it is on the kid.
11 months is right in the height of separation anxiety. Rachel is now 15 months and is beginning to get a little better. Trust me - all during Christmas I had to hold her...
I get the doldrums in January/February too. Its cold/wet/rainy here. At least in Dec. you can look forward to Christmas and there are those activities around, but Jan/Feb are the worst. I can't wait until March when I can walk with them to the neighborhood park again.
Most of my advice is 'what not to do'.
Just don't turn Paul in one direction and run out the other. He won't know what is going on. As painfull as it seems, you just have to say, "By Paul, I'm going away for a little while, but I'll be back". Then brace yourself for hysterical crying-which as others have suggested will not last as long as you think.
-This is also supposed to build trust because you will, in fact, be back. But who really knows. All I know is that it is painful and sucks.
Grit your teeth and bear it. And plan for a transition of at least four weeks. Also, it may help to have John do the drop-off for Paul at first--this was the breakthrough for us when we were starting Johanna in daycare, because she wasn't quite so hung up on him and the goodbye was easier.
Good luck! You just have to leave and let him cry and eventually he will be fine. It is hard to do but is necessary!
How has PhD work been this past year? Have you done much at all??
Drew - my first chapter is in revisions, soon to be submitted (yay!). I'm finishing up the analysis on my second chapter before I can begin writing. I also finished a large report for a research assistantship that funded me for a year (which also included field work the last two summers). So, yes, I have made some progress, but it has been slow. Teaching at the local community college this fall also took up a lot of time.
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